Don't expect anything and you can't get dissappointed.

Most men are notoriously bad with dates. I am lucky enough to have my husband get my birthday off by one day. Our Anniversary Date off by one day and he does remember that Valentines Day is sometime in February, but don't ask him when.

I have learned over the last 8 Years in which I have been with the love of my life to never expect anything. At first I would throw really broad hints at him, up to including giving him a wish list, which I thought would make it extremely easy. No go, because he still would forget the day and the wish list. Then one day I just finally gave up. I swore myself that I would no longer remind him, it is on the calender. I would no longer expect him to remember and to make a big deal out of it.

This year on Mother's Day my husband almost gave me a heart attack. He came home on the right day after work and brought me 1 single long stemmed red Rose. I was in heaven. See, when you don't expect anything, you may just be pleasantly surprised.

"Honey, does this dress make me look fat?"

There are certain questions a woman always asks and should really never ask if she doesn't want to hear the honest answer. Living with a devote "Asshole" (eh he calls himself that-I didn't do it) you never know what the answer might be.

His most recent answer to this particular question just to be very fair to the truth was a solid one. Really you can't argue with it, maybe throw something, but argue no. His solid advise. "No honey, the fat makes you look fat, the dress is just fine!"

Rolls her eyes.

Learning to keep silent.

As a wife and mother you want to make the life of your loved ones easier. You automatically think you have to take the decisions out of their hands and just do everything for them. The reality is however, that you are NOT helping anyone at all when you are trying to change their world on them.

Right now I am trying to just keep silent when I watch my loved ones run head forward into problems. As a female I am very intuitive and often can sense issues coming our way before the others in my home have their fingers put on them.

My hubby is a good man and he doesn't need me to tell him what to do. I know that he can make his own wise decisions and I respect him. It is still hard at times not to try to pamper him the wrong way. I am so used to dealing with kids, but ever since I learned to curb my talking a bit and just let him do his own thing again and me concentrate on mine our marriage is getting almost amazing. Ladies, take it from me, you would be surprised what a bit of quiet time will do for a man. Give him love and respect, not mothering!

The harder part is letting my daughter run into her own walls and make her own mistakes. I hate it. Personally I think that my poor tongue will have deep ridges soon from biting it so hard and often.

Watching my kid slip away.

My 17 1/2 Year old daughter and I went for a walk to the Grocery Store today. A nice little walk of about 1 1/2 Miles that does both our waistlines good. I left the house in a great mood and returned 2 hours later feeling just a bit older and a lot sadder then when I started this journey out.

We used to enjoy our Times together and were able to talk about anything and everything. She is a very good kid, graduated an entire Year early out of High School and has stayed away from the entire drug and alcohol scene. Something to be very proud out. Now she is only 5 month away from her 18th Birthday and life is coming at her fast. We agreed 2 Years ago that one month after she turned 18 she would spread her wings and fly.
Yes, it is hard to watch your kid embark on the real life journey of building her own life, but these days it is becoming beyond frightening for me to have to watch.

She is working an evening job full time in a Restaurant which brings her NO Benefits at all and pays her all but $7.25 an hour. At about 32 hours a week, you and I know that this is nowhere near enough to make ends meet. She gets home about 11pm at night and then sleeps until about 1 pm the following day. This has caused so many arguments between us by now I have lost count. Ever since she graduated from School that seems to be the extend of her days. Work for 6 hours, come home eat and sleep the rest of the time. She has no Friends and no social life. I am more then worried about that, because she will need the security net of "friends" around her when she first takes the steps into adulthood.

Today was no different. Typical Mom I had warned her against wearing high heeled boots to walk so far, she of course knowing more then me, wore them anyway and that is where the problem already started. Of course it didn't take longer then only a few minutes before her feet were killing her. My typically motherly remark of course was the predictable: "I told you not to wear them" Her typically teenage remark:" Yeah, yeah I know Mom."

On the way I asked her again about getting either a better paying job in the daytime so she could actually try to have a social life and get home at a decent hour. She started snapping all over the place, which truly sat my teeth on edge. I am trying to remember these days that the truth is that she is now at the point of: "I no longer need to listen!" What worries me is that she also seems to have no drive to succeed any longer. Her dreams seem to have evaporated.

I reminded her that she had only 5 month left until her 18 Birthday and what she wanted to do with her life when she got there. Her remark? "I don't know, I guess I figure it out when I get there!"

I am not sure if I want to beat her with a stick at this point or wrap her up in Bubble Wrap. All I know is that we no longer can have any normal two way debate or conversation without me wanting to scream after and her feeling hurt. Watching my kid slip slowly away from me completely without her having a clue how to be anything even remotely adult is killing me.

I guess I might as well print out the "Administration Application" to the School of hard knocks for her now and let her fill it out.